Maybe my head is still reeling from my last post. Maybe it was the forward my friend sent me about a book on how to NOT be a perfect mom. It got me thinking. If we are all banded together on ending or not participating in the Mommy Wars, then who is still out there being a bully? Have we created the Mommy Wars because of our own insecurities? Is it all in our heads? No, seriously. Is this something us mothers feel burdened with just from general conversation with each other? We all do things differently. That doesn't make any of us wrong. We are all on a mission to raise good kids and hope we all come out alive with minimal scarring. No one goes out and TRIES to raise a shitty kid. We are all doing our best!
I know I only have a one year old and we have so much more life to experience, but these questions that raise self-doubt of motherhood start before birth! Pain med birth or natural? Breastfeed or formula? To co-sleep or not? Does it really matter? Yes, there might be "scientific data" proving one way or the other is "better". But honestly, you can find "data" for any side of the topic you want to be on. Just Google it. Someone is out there on your side. :) At the end of the day, parenting is freaking hard (I think that's my new catch phrase!). You are in pain (you know, after birth). You are sleep deprived. You are depressed. You are responsible for another life. Who the hell cares what the answer is to any of those three questions?! Your kid will be fine and you won't love them any less.
It can become hard to have a conversation with another mother because you don't want your ways challenged any more than they do. There's that "punched in the gut" feeling when someone disagrees or is vocal about not doing things the same way as you. Again, does that make it a war or are we just a little insecure because we know we don't always pick the "popular" way and we have to defend our parenting style? Maybe we should hear each other out, support each other, and try to learn something from each other.
Bottom line. Moms, you're all doing an amazing thing. Dads, too. Don't be sorry for how you choose to raise your child. To quote my last post, "Behind every great kid is a parent who is doing their best, by all means possible, at any given moment."
Ok, I am getting off my soapbox. :) I have some fun posts about Mac & Cheese, Moving Tips, and a Lean & Healthy Guest Post coming your way soon!